So, I took a ridiculous hiatus from Blog writing last year, and I have recently decided that I needed to get back into it. Most people find my blog to be a waste of time, a way for me to rant, or a place for me to try and get attention. Unfortunately for you, by definition a blog is where an individual records opinions on a regular basis. Now, although I may not write about my opinions daily (and it's probably best), I definitely enjoy my blog.
Thanks to my over 22,000 visitors - woohoo!
Now that the formalities are out of the way...
I have decided to make a pretty big life change. As all, or most, of you know, I am a Reservist in the Air Force as a Medic stationed at McChord AFB, WA. I have been doing this great job for over 4 years now, and my biggest regret is not going Active Duty right away. However, with that, I have been able to experience some great things, meet some amazing people, and create some awesome memories. While I can't foresee what the future holds, I have had a "fuck it" moment and decided it was time for me to find my happiness. Now, I can't go on an 'Eat, Pray, Love' whirlwind world tour, but I can change some little things.
Firstly, I quit my job. For my readers, you know that I have not had the best luck with jobs. A few prior posts probably included some connotation of this, but that's old news. For about a year now, I worked for an Advertising Agency where I made great money and have been given some great knowledge and experience. But I felt like something was missing. I never pictured myself sitting behind a desk all day punching away at a keyboard. I needed a way out. Although everyone in my family thinks I need to get my job back, I can't help but feel like a weight is lifted off my shoulders. Yeah, I am going to be broke here in a few months.. but why live a life of misery? I had no life. I had no friends. I woke up, drove for over an hour to get to work, sat around behind a computer, drove home for over an hour, and by the time I got home, I was too tired to do anything else. Who wants that?
Secondly, I decided to transfer bases and go to Travis AFB, CA. I have driven past this base a handful of times, and I even had a cup of coffee there once. Other than that, I know nothing about it. That's the beauty of it. It's a new realm that, although scary, is intriguing because it's a new adventure. The bible says many times, "do not be afraid." In fact, this phrase is written 365 times - once for each day. So my friends, I will not be afraid.
Finally, I'm moving. I know what a lot of people are thinking. "Geez, she moves so much." or "again?!" and my favorite, "what are you going to do with yourself?" Well, to be honest, I have not thought this one through. Going back to my previous "fuck it" statement, I have been doing a lot of thinking. Why do I need to figure everything out? Why must there need to be plans for plans? It makes no sense to me.
I have lived a calendared, post-it noted, file foldered life.
I don't need a sticky note to tell me anything anymore. I don't need to file away copies of copies of things chronologically and alphabetically. I don't need to go to lunch right at noon. Frankly, I don't give a damn about conformity anymore. It's my life. It's my mistakes. Mostly, it's my experiences. I know that financially, it is definitely not smart, but what if this is the opportunity I have been waiting for?
There are so many people who don't get the opportunity to just go and do things. I never want to be that person who is trapped, stuck, and has no room to fly. What is so hard to understand that it's ok to have no idea what you are doing- but just going out and doing something.
My life has consisted of pleasing everyone else and always feeling like no matter what, I was never enough. But- I will still march to the beat of my own drum.
When my family asks me, "what are you even thinking? What on Earth are you doing?" Well, everything.
I will never have my life figured out. It's no fun that way.